The End?

Just as the project leader Bruticus has indicated in the comments section, I’ve been leaning towards pulling the plug on this three-month project the last several days. I have my reasons, and I’m not looking for support in my decision at all, but I felt I did owe the readers at least some kind of explanation. The first thing that comes to mind is that I said all along, from the very beginning, that I would take this site down if it stopped being fun. Well, the truth is, I lied about that. I’ve been forcing myself to update these last several weeks despite the fact that it has never been once been fun during the entire trip through PS:T. It could be a number of factors, really. It could be that I just don’t like blogging about Planescape. It could be I’m sick of fucking playing a two-hour chunk and then sitting down and recapping my every step before I can move on and play some more. It could be some combination of the two.

What is most certainly is not the issue is the game. Weeks back I got over my issues with Planescape, and I now appreciate it as being a very fine game in its own right. I certainly prefer Fallout 2 without any question, but Planescape itself is not the problem. I’m just tired of blogging about it! It makes me dread playing the actual game, and that’s not right. It breaks up the flow of the game process to pause for an hour to gather screen shots and journal my experiences, especially considering everyone here balked when I tried to condense my experiences into a shorter entry. Look, I experimented with different blogging styles for the game because quite frankly the specific narrative I was doing in Fallout 2 started to grow old even while I was still playing that game. I didn’t want to keep doing that style, because I sensed I would burn out at some point, but no one liked the other styles, self included. So I returned to what worked with Fallout 2, all the while hating the process every time I sat down to write.

Now, when I think of PS:T, I don’t think of how curious I am about TNO’s story, and how close I am to uncovering some important shit that would doubtlessly hook me in even more so. I think about how annoying it is that as soon as I play for a few hours, I’d better stop and describe what I did. I guess game blogging just isn’t for me, because I’m sure some people would be more than happy to describe their gaming experiences as they’re playing through a game for the first time. I don’t feel that way. In fact, I recall a poster on the Codex who specifically told me I should stop concentrating so much on my “summer journal” and just fuck off and play the game. I think that person was dead on. If you can concentrate on playing a game and blogging about it without it ruining the experience, great, but ultimately I don’t think that’s for me.

Even now, as I tentatively begin the process of dragging this blog out back to put an end to its miserable life, I feel liberation. And I feel like fucking playing Planescape for the first time in over a week, because I won’t be obligated to retrace all my steps later and describe them to you all. And let’s be honest: many of you have picked up on the lack of passion in the last several updates anyway. This blog isn’t even fun to read anymore, is it? Let’s just be honest about everything, here. I guess technically this means I lose the challenge I agreed to take on, but I don’t feel that way at all. I believe I’ll finish PS:T in my own time, and I believe I’ll keep my eye on the RPG genre from now on. I think that’s saying something. I do agree it was silly to get competitive about it and threaten to beat it out of spite, but some of the hate I find in the Codex forums really brings out the worst in me.

Anyway, I’m not asking for sympathy or understanding. I really don’t care what the overall reaction to my decision is. The fact is, I’m not having fun, readers are ducking out left and right, and continuing for the sake of continuing is just going to ruin what enjoyment I do get out of games like PS:T. Sure, at the peak of the Fallout 2 entries this was a lot of fun, but it hasn’t been for a while, and I’ve given up on hoping it will be again. I appreciate all the support, all the readers, all the comments, but in the end this blog is not a necessary component of learning to appreciate the RPG classics, is it? If I could find a way to share my experiences along the way and entertain a few people, great, but if not, oh well. Time to move on.

As far as challenges go, I suppose I could keep up some semblance of this blog just to chronicle the fact that I am still playing the game, even if it’s just a simple screen shot entry with the three words “I beat it.” I’m open to anything personally, but what I’m not open to is taking the page down altogether. There’s no point in that. I’ll leave it up just in case I get that spark to come back here and add a new entry, or until I decide to remove it. By no means am I making any promises to update in the future, so feel free to sever ties with this URL if it helps you attain some sort of peace of mind. Again, thanks for all the comments; it was great hearing everyone’s reaction on a regular basis.

Slower Pace

Hello, readers. I just wanted to make a quick note that I’ve been out of town (and will continue to be so for the next several days) as well as apologize for the lack of updates. It’s highly unlikely I’ll be done with the game by August 1, but finishing by a deadline is a pretty pointless endeavor when it comes to playing a video game, so I’ll be removing that deadline and taking all the time I need to finish PS:T. The pace en route to finishing the game may be slower than anticipated, but hopefully that will allow me to give it the attention it deserves. Thanks for your continued support everyone! I really am very eager to see TNO’s story revealed.

An Updated Word On RPG’S

I briefly thought about the comedic value of typing just one short thought in here and leaving it at that: “I hate them.” And as much as I would have enjoyed that in regards to my own twisted sense of humor, it wouldn’t be fair, and I dare say I would probably get a few disgusted comments. Plus, I was plenty scathing to my gentle readers in the last post, so why pile it on? The fact is every person that has taken the time to comment on here has meant well, and has given some great advice, and that means a lot to me. Especially to the regulars who have commented on so many of my entries, trust me when I say you guys are awesome. I would absolutely buy you all a beer if we just happened to have, like, an SGD meeting at some neutral location. Wow, I’m arrogant. But we all know some of you would show up. Maybe.

I’ll get to the point. Planescape is hurting me, bad. It’s just as I feared before I started this game. I can barely stand to play it, and then writing about it afterwards is like picking at the freshly inflicted wounds with the blunt instrument I had to jab in my eye a few days ago, only it’s rusty this time and infects the wounds and gives me some sort of horrible disease that guarantees death, a sweet release of sorts that would at least free me from the shackles this infernal game has me in! Let me stop to catch my breath; that was a long sentence. Have I reminded everyone that I love you all? I feel bad I’m not tackling this game with as much effort as I did Fallout 2, and I do fear losing the audience bit by bit. I’ll do my best to battle through this at a steady pace until I enjoy the game more, and I’ll continue to work on a writing style that isn’t hated by all some.

Today, for instance, I played. I swear I played. I have it all on video for later reference. I utilized the map key for the first time and holy shit did it ever make me feel better about finding my way around The Hive. I found a very crucial area and had some very meaningful interactions. But enough about the upcoming blog entry (shameless tease). Overall, I must say, my new interest in the RPG genre is not wilting. I am somewhat put off by PS:T, but I understand that it doesn’t mean I won’t get into it yet, and I understand even if I never like the game, there could still be tons of future games to play that I’ll love as much as (or more than) FO2. The fantasy aspects do tend to make my eyes glaze over just a little, but if the story were hooking me in the way it’s supposed to be, I don’t really think that would matter. I know I can get through this, because my faith in RPG’s has not been damaged. I’m struggling big time, but as I’ve said repeatedly, I’m not giving up, and I still believe the best is yet to come, even for this game.

Some final thoughts, in no particular order… I don’t like to reply in the comments section. I think of it as a pure space for reader thoughts only, just as this space is for my thoughts only. Sorry, it’s just a firm belief I have and would sooner die than stray from. Secondly, if anyone was curious about my name, you may refer to me as Sprayahen, Mr. Sprayahen, or Spencer, which is my actual name, and certainly likely to show up on a Google search associated with “sprayahen” if you somehow decided you wanted to look me up. Again, my ego reveals itself. Since we’re all getting to be so close here, I’m fine with the whole first name thing. Let’s see, where there any other oft-asked questions I felt the need to address? Oh, yeah. I don’t write these instead of writing game updates; I write these because I have no game updates to write, so anyone concerned about the general update days taking away from game progress need not worry; it’s either these or nothing. Lastly, yes, I’m sure I’m short-changing a very quality game and offending some people in the process, but don’t take my complaints too seriously. I’m still having a good time overall. Again, when that is no longer true, the link you have saved for this page will no longer take you anywhere but the abyss TNO is so familiar (and yet unfamiliar) with.

Breaking News!

Let the record show this is the first time I’ve made two posts in one day (I do that on purpose, by the way). I don’t care if this fucking game takes me five years to play, I’m going to fucking beat it, and I’m going to make fun of it and everyone that likes it, because that’s my right when I’ve completed it. I’ve grown quite fond of my readers, but let it be known, to anyone who hates, to anyone who doubts: I’ll do this just to stick it to you (and in you), and you’ll come here to read about it, by God, because you can’t look away in spite of yourself. It’s like some kind of sick, vicious cycle that no one here has the power to stop. If I have to make an ass out of myself in front of a bunch of gaming snobs (I say that with the utmost love and fondness) several times in the process, so fucking be it. I started this project not expecting an audience, and if the fact that I don’t like every game I play bothers you, fair enough, but that’s not going to change what I set out to do. If any of the comments were meant as reverse psychology, it’s not necessary, because I’m not quitting. I’m just not making any promises about my writing style, pace, or overall opinions of the game (not part of the challenge, Bruticus).

Fraps And More

Okay, so the style of the first entry was not popular. Let me explain: The Mortuary sucked. I don’t mean to make excuses, but I wasn’t feeling it while I played the initial area, not in the slightest. Most of the readers are familiar with this game and very aware of all the nuances involved, so you know what I mean when I say there wasn’t a lot of freedom or flexibility. There’s no possibility to create that many different types of characters to embody TNO, and for the most part, there are only a few choices to make. For anyone wandering, I did manage to increase my hit point total by bringing embalming fluid and thread to the female dust…man? Aside from dabbling in the zombie disguise, though, there was no other quest I took on or conversation I had that seemed to tell me anything worth repeating aside from the experience with Dhall.

Nevertheless, I’m not giving up — yet. I’ve been a little busier lately, but I have begun my play in The Hive area, and much like Klamath after the comforts of Arroyo, I’m lost, confused, and overwhelmed by the great number of people to talk to. Things are getting a little more interesting, though, and perhaps I’ll find the game grows on me quickly like it did with Fallout 2. Like I said, I’m not giving up hope yet.

I’ve decided to dabble with the program Fraps due to the fact that the game won’t allow me to take more than five screen shots in one play session. Even better, Fraps has video recording ability, so I may well record my entire adventure through the game, which will make writing about it much easier, since I can just reference my play as I write. I’m excited that the advancing game plot and Fraps can help bring some more life to these entries.

But one final note, and possibly harsh reminder: this is a so-called re-education process for me, one intended to teach me there is a better type of game out there, a dying (or dead) breed as such, one that I’ve never played before. My purpose was merely to write about my experiences in learning about this type of game, but I never promised I would enjoy it. I was pleasantly surprised in that I enjoyed Fallout 2, but I expressed concerns about Planescape, and quite frankly, it hasn’t hooked me so far, plain and simple. I’ll continue to update my diary (just as TNO does in his adventure) in regards to my gaming experiences, but that doesn’t mean I have to like what I’m playing. Fair enough?

That said, continued input is always welcome, and I’ll do my best to please my audience. I’ll definitely be trying a new format from the last entry, seeing as now no one (self included) got much enjoyment out of it. I hope things get more interesting in The Hive, and I hope Fraps makes the blogging experience easier in terms of recalling what I did at various points in play.

Back To Work

I just wanted to leave a quick note that I had to make an impromptu out of town trip but am now settled and ready to get going. Thanks for the patience and tips. The opening area is definitely confusing for a first-time player, but it’s beginning to make more sense to me. I expect to make enough progress for the first entry by tomorrow, so stay tuned!

Still Learning The Ropes

After getting my first taste of PS:T, I can safely say this is going to be one interesting game. I haven’t managed to check off either of the first two quests I’ve been given, but I’ve been doing some exploring, inventory reading, and a lot of conversing with a skull. I’m definitely drawn into the story already, and looking forward to helping TNO figure out the mysteries of himself. My understanding of the interface is definitely not there yet, but I’m getting a little smoother.

I just wanted to let everyone know that I’m still in training mode; looking, playing with, exploring, feeling out, that sort of thing. I’m going to see how far I can get before I make an attempt to share more specific thoughts. I’ve got plenty of screen shots of my adventure already, although I’ve accomplished very little. This is normal, I suppose. After all, it took me like a week to figure Klamath out in Fallout 2, so I’ll get there. Game updates in the very near future, and thanks for your patience!

And Now, A Word From Our Sponsors

With Fallout 2 behind me (in body, not in spirit), it’s only fitting to usher in the new phase of the project by going over what has just been completed. Tomorrow, I’m going to be introducing the next game and discussing all the patches and settings I’m using or not using for my experience, and unlike last time, I don’t think there will be a great debate over my decisions halfway through the game.

Having said that, now is a perfect time to share a brief update about my conversion process to the RPG world. I’ll say this: I loved Fallout 2. A lot. As I said, I’ve already played many new characters on a different computer, and I’ve made a ton of progress even since finishing Geronimo’s journey. I currently have a guy who has owned the early stages of the game (the gifted trait really does do wonders, doesn’t it?) and is currently in Broken Hills at Level 9. I’ve taken such a different route than I did with Geronimo, it’s astounding. Actually knowing what I’m doing for the whole game makes it so fun, and I’ve already discovered tons of things I missed the first time, especially since I was absolutely clueless in those early entries (Klamath… it’s so big!). Anyway, the point is, I love Fallout 2, and am certain as a result I would love certain aspects of any computer RPG. The key component there is certain aspects.

Going forward to the next game, I’m not converted enough to pretend I’m not fearful. After all, Fallout 2 and Planescape: Torment are two very different things, right? Fallout 2 is not really a fantasy setting as such; it’s more sci-fi oriented, and the plot didn’t turn me off at all since it didn’t feel like I was playing an active part straight out of a book by J. R. R. Tolkien. My fear is that Planescape: Torment will lose me in its Dungeons and Dragons based gameplay, and prove some of my original ill-conceived RPG assumptions correct. To sum it up, I’m not as against RPG’s as I might have once thought, but I’m still worried that the great majority of titles are going to bore me to death. That won’t stop me from playing, mind you, and I certainly don’t mean any offense in saying these fears aloud. After all, I’m determined to give the genre the fair chance I never did before, even it means walking away from it more certain of my disdain than ever. I want to like Torment, need to like Torment for the sake of this blog, but I admit seeing the screen shots scares me in a way Fallout 2 never did. I guess the only way to find out is to push ahead, right?

And push ahead I’ll do, starting with the new project tomorrow. For today, it’s time to take one last lingering look at Fallout 2. What more is there to say at this point? Not much. I just wanted to repeat how impressed I am that the game so flexibly allows you to win with a character of any style. The futuristic/post-apocalyptic setting is very nicely created, including the 1950’s era presentations and musical stylings. The introduction is very well put together, as are the end sequences, which truly make you feel accomplished as a gamer since all these things happened because of your actions. I’ve never seen an ending quite like that before, and I was blown away. Seriously. The voice acting, for the few characters that were given a voice, was tremendous, and again, the narration done in the introduction and ending was top notch. Overall, this is quite simply a very quality package, one done with love and care not often found in a video game of any kind, and I’m very pleased to have gotten the opportunity to learn about the Fallout franchise.

The downsides? I’ve already covered them. I understand the game wasn’t that long by RPG standards, but not only did it seem long to me based on the games I’ve played comparatively, it didn’t really seem like it needed to be that long. Seriously, San Francisco gave me no pleasure whatsoever, and the nostalgia I felt at the end stemmed more from the fact I’d taken one single character and brought him through everything for over a month of gameplay. I was actually quite glad to be done with the game, and I don’t think that should be the case in a perfect product. There have to be games out there that the player never wants to end, even if they’ve been playing 300 hours, right? Anyway, Fallout 2 wasn’t perfect, but it was a damn fine game nonetheless. I’m sure I’ll continue to revisit it the rest of my life, and not many games fall in that category.

So, with everything mentioned, I’m going to bestow an arbitrary rating on the game per my experiences with it. Bear in mind this is not so much a critical review rating as much as it is a rating of how much I personally enjoyed the game, which may mean very little if in fact my taste isn’t up to par. My hope is that during this re-education program, I’ll become seasoned enough to reach the point where my personal enjoyment in a game matches up pretty well with how good the game was overall. A pretty lofty goal, I know, and especially considering the games I used to spend my spare time playing. I don’t think I’ll ever confess those games, by the way, except to say it wasn’t all bad. I was big on Thief, Deus Ex, Evil Genius, and Civilization 4 for instance. But the other direction… we won’t go there. I’m pretty sure I’d have no readers left.

As a final note, I will say there must be some hope for me in regards to enjoying any RPG-based game I ever come across. I was reading (sort of reading, never finished) a lengthy article given to me by Bruticus about the roots of RPG’s, which discussed in length where it all came from, and discovered to my surprise that the baseball simulation game Strat-O-Matic was involved in the process. While I don’t and have never played Strat-O-Matic (sorry; was born in the “console tard” generation as my cousin keeps reminding me), I do order a well-regarded PC baseball simulation game every year and play the absolute hell out of it. One that has no graphics and all text, even. So yeah, that bodes well, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it?

By the way, I almost forgot I’m supposed to rate Fallout 2. I’ll be using a standard 1-10 scale, using a .5 if I feel it falls in between two numbers. I’ll use this format for every game played in the future as well. So with that said…

Final Score: 8.5

General Update Day

With one last enormous bite to chew off before this game is finished, I thought I’d hold a quick question and answer session to fill the space on what would otherwise be another day with no update. No drama intended at all; if I felt and any real sense of tension, I’d pull the plug on the project and erase the blog so fast no one would ever have been able to prove it was here in the first place. Believe me, I’ve had my share of unfinished projects.

But this isn’t one of them. I do apologize for the quick summaries of the last few areas; was hoping it didn’t show, but indeed, I did rush through the writing, but that’s not to say I’m no longer enjoying Fallout 2. Far from it. In fact, true confession time: I’m actually playing around with several different characters on a different computer in my house, reliving the early part of the game over and over again, enjoying the unofficial patch from the beginning this time around. I think the real joy in Fallout 2 is the character design process. I’m really curious to see how this game varies with different builds, ie a science-oriented guy, someone who’s extremely intelligent (like a 10 instead of Geronimo’s 8), someone who never really uses combat unless it absolutely must come down to it. Or maybe it’d be fun to see what a close-range/melee type fighter with little intelligence would offer. Maybe a sneak/steal type? You get the idea. I understand speech and lockpicking are critical, and thus are usually impossible not to tag, but I’m fascinated by the ideas of future playthroughs with this game.

So no, I’m far from bored. I am, however, trying to get to the end quickly, because I do feel the game is just sort of delaying it without any real purpose. I didn’t really want to go through another big ass city like San Francisco and was slightly irritated to find it wasn’t a quick shot like Navarro; I just want to move the story along, and these last few locations haven’t really done that for me. I’ve really enjoyed a lot of the locations, like Redding, The Den, Vault City, and Modoc, but a few along the way have either overwhelmed me or felt unnecessary. I’m not trying to be critical; Fallout 2 as a whole is fantastic, but it has not been a consistently thrilling ride all the way. That’s all I’m saying. It feels like perhaps these last few spots for me have been sort of the low-end of the rollercoaster, and I’ve let it show in my writing. I’ll work hard not to do that for in future games; why write all this if it isn’t fun for anyone to read, right?

Lastly, there is one final element to take into consideration: pressure. True, I’m likely putting it on myself, because by and large the comments have indicated a pretty patient crowd, but I do feel an obligation to deliver a post every so often, even if I didn’t get where I wanted to in the game or even if I don’t have a really firm grasp on what I just played. If I didn’t comprehend what I recently played and enjoy it, making it a good read proves quite a challenge.

But I digress. Those concerned about the nature of the last few entries need not be worried. I’m not losing interest, and I’m obviously not going to keep churning out shitty posts just for the sake of content. Again, if it comes to that, I’ll take this fucker down. But I’m having a good time for now, so I’m sticking with it, and I hope you all do, too. It’s been great reading all your comments and getting your feedback; it’d be a hell of a lot of fun to just have a roundtable Fallout 2 discussion, in fact, with player stories and experiences and methods of play.

I promise not to let my alternate playthroughs cut into Geronimo’s almost-over quest, and I will definitely put my all into the final FO 2 blog entries. As far as the Enclave itself in the game, well… if it kicks my ass too much for too long, there will either be a walkthrough consulted or a lack of new posts for a while. I’m about to get to it as we speak! Thanks for the continued support, readers.

A Word On RPG’S

With Part Two of Geronimo’s New Reno experience on the way (but slightly delayed due to the fact that getting through the city is proving very difficult), I’ve decided to take the day to write about my general thoughts on this project so far. This was suggested by a reader in the comments yesterday, and I thought it was an excellent idea.

As most of you that have visited this blog are already aware of, I’m only writing these entries and playing this game because  my cousin forced me into it. I can’t pretend Fallout 2 would ever have graced my computer otherwise, but I must say, I’m glad it has at this point. As I mentioned previously, it’s not that I don’t consider myself a big fan of games. Quite the opposite, actually, and some of the games I’ve loved would even fall into a respectable category for even the most elitist fans of the industry. That said, I’ve dabbled in more than a few games places like the RPG Codex would hunt me down for playing. Several weeks into Fallout 2, I can honestly admit that it’s made a lasting impact on me.

The transition is far from over, and I still find myself frustrated at times. There were moments the first several play sessions that I wished I had never accepted the project, ie wandering around aimlessly in Klamath without any idea how the hell to complete a quest in the open-ended world I found myself in. It didn’t help that I had absolutely no idea what most of the items or weapons I came across were useful for, or how to shape my character as I gradually accumulated more experience points. Without a doubt, the journey has been a rough one, and I’ve never been able to accomplish much without a hint or push here and there. I’ll admit I find it a challenging game, more so because I view it from a storyteller’s perspective. I have two jobs when I play Fallout: 1) Play the game and 2) Remember each important detail so I can share it with the readers. When I’m wandering around a city (like New Reno, which is by far the biggest offender at this point) forever with seemingly no grasp on what I’m actually doing, it proves very frustrating for me. Sometimes, an hour of play can be so unproductive I could condense the occurences in one paragraph.

But without a doubt, my experience has been more enjoyable than anything else. My eyes have been opened to the role-playing genre, and I am absolutely willing to play others like Fallout 2 after I (God willing) beat this game. I think my biggest misconception about the genre comes from my extremely limited experiences with games like Final Fantasy, which I played briefly when I was much younger. I didn’t like the fact that an RPG put the viewer in a world that basically seemed ripe for exploring (like an adventure game, something my tastes have historically been much more suited for) only to interrupt this seamless experience by thrusting the character into combat with some creature he/she came across. I understand this may seem like an ignorant viewpoint, but bear in mind Iwas much younger and much more impatient.

Another stigma (in my mind) of role-playing games involved the concept of turn-based combat. That was always a turn-off to me. I realize that may sound blasphemous to RPG lovers, but it’s just not what I’m accustomed to. I wasn’t big on the idea of having to cast spells, fight monstrous creatures, or count hit points either. I’m much more comfortable when combat happens in real-time. Is that such an unforgivable thing? At any rate, I’ve gotten over my aversion to hit points, and the turn-based combat system in FO2 actually makes sense now that I’ve seen how skills/perks have an impact on it. I still have concerns going forward about the fantasy nature of RPG’s; the setting in Fallout 2 is perfectly appealing to me, but I’m worried games styled more in the mould of Dungeons and Dragons might bore me.

Having said all this, I’m very willing to give anything a try. My cousin and I have been discussing future games that I can play (and blog about, of course), and have pretty much settled on Planescape: Torment for the next one, although it’s not locked up just yet. I’ve done a little reading about the game, and it seems very fascinating. The idea of playing an evil character who is immortal will be a welcome change after controlling Geronimo all this time, a do-gooder who sometimes proves a little too mortal.

As far as what keeps me playing now, it’s definitely the appeal of the game, not just this project and bet with my cousin. I’m a spiteful person who can be motivated by being told I can’t do something, but I honestly doubt I’d have made it this far through a game I didn’t enjoy. To be more succint, I am hooked. I’m hooked on the character I’ve created and nurtured through over a dozen levels of experience. I’m hooked on the concept of helping all the cities I’ve come through, and in bringing the Garden of Eden Creation Kit back to Arroyo. I’m hooked on the concept of continuing to improve so I can enjoy the sight of Geronimo dominating enemies that once dominated him. It’s this aspect of RPG’s, the “character development” aspect, that I think addicts me the most. You feel a lot of attachment to the person you made after you’ve steered them through so many battles. What I’m trying to say is that I love Geronimo like a son; got a problem with that?

All things considered, I won’t hesitate to admit that I was wrong about RPG’s at this point. Or perhaps it’s more accurate to admit that I was wrong about at least one of them.